by Melody Leathers
Pastor’s Wife
Lewisburg, Tennessee

WHEN I WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL, one of my fingers started hurting. I thought if I left it alone that it would heal on its own, but the problem got worse. One day a bright yellow mark appeared where the pain was the worst. I had to open up the skin—which relieved the pain and eventually brought healing to the wound. Believe it or not, I still have problems with infection in that finger. In fact, I had to have it lanced open a few years ago because of recurring infection. I have learned that when my finger first starts hurting is the best time to heal the wound. The same is true for those of us who were/are being bullied.

THE WOUND MUST BE OPENED.

Psalm 147:3, “He healeth the broken in heart.…” The bullying I had received would define my life for the next 15 years. I would cry every time I would think about it. Most people didn’t seem to understand because I couldn’t really explain it. Please understand that just because you cannot define the hurt doesn’t mean it isn’t there.

The trouble is that most people have a hard time doing what they need to do. A few years ago I needed someone else to step in. I needed a doctor to open my wound. When we have issues that cause almost immediate tears (or even unseen tears), we need a doctor.

The Great Physician has given us healing through His Word and through His servants. Psalm 73:24 says, “Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel.…” 

You need someone who knows God’s Word and has a good listening ear.

THE WOUND MUST BE CLEANSED.

After my wound was opened, it needed to be cleaned. The infection and germs needed to be gone. The problem was that it wasn’t a one-time thing. I had to clean my finger a few times a day to get rid of the infection.

Like many other things in life, the effects of bullying take longer to heal than the bullying itself. The old saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” is not quite right. The wounds from words need to heal just as wounds on our bodies need to heal.

Our inner-wound healing needs to happen a few times a day as well. We need to read our Bibles, listen to our Bibles (an audio version), and listen to sermons. God cleans our wounds with His Words. He is the balm in Gilead.

THE WOUND MUST BE ALLOWED TO HEAL.

When we are in pain, we don’t like to feel. Another thing we don’t like to do is breathe. For some reason, many humans use not breathing as a defense mechanism…but if you do it too long, that plan backfires.

Let’s learn from Ephesians 5 how to heal our feelings.

1. Be filled with the Holy Spirit.

Ephesians 5:18, “…but be filled with the Spirit.” When we have feelings of hurt, rejection, and unimportance, we need to allow ourselves to be emptied of those feelings and filled with the Spirit. If we allow our vessel to be filled with infection, the Spirit cannot fill us. Ask God for help. Pray many times a day that you would be filled with the Spirit. He loves to help us!

2. Be thankful. Ephesians 5:20, “Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” Being thankful in EVERYTHING helps us realize that God is in control, that we can grow beyond our hurts, and that we have benefit.

I love verse 19 of Psalm 68, which says, “Blessed be the Lord, who daily loadeth us with benefits, even the God of our Salvation. Selah.” God is very good to us. Make a habit of being thankful for at least one thing every day.

3. Sing! Ephesians 5:19, “Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord.” The healing that is in your spirit is jump-started by singing. A lot of times, we are not comfortable with singing because we don’t obey God. He told us to talk to each other in psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs. He told us to sing and hum (even simply in our hearts) to the Lord. When we sing, we are not singing to others. We are singing to the Lord, and this brings healing.

May I challenge you to allow the Great Physician open up your wounds and help you heal!